The decision to self-publish such a revealing book while still in college came out of frustration, because Binstock couldn’t find adequate information about her disorders.

“I looked for books to give me guidance, but I couldn’t find much,” Binstock said. “The books that I did find either ended unrealistic or morbid with someone dying. My book ends realistically but not morbidly. It’s not a happy-ever-after ending because I’m still working every day to control my body and mind.”

Her road to self reflection began when she was 15. Binstock started to write her thoughts in a journal for her high school sophomore English class. With the support of her English teacher, Binstock won a Gold Key Award from the Alliance for Young Artists and Writers for her essay about her struggle with anorexia.

Binstock revealed how she processed her struggles through treatments, medications and their side effects in order to give people hope. She wants others to know that they are not alone in their suffering. In the book, she discusses the therapeutic techniques that worked and didn’t work for her.

“I started doing my own research looking for hope for the future because most doctors that I saw wanted to focus on my past,” Binstock said. “I was lost, and I didn’t know what to do in the present. That’s when I became interested in cognitive behavior therapy. After my bad luck with several psychiatrists who only talked about my past, I found one that was very helpful, worked with cognitive behavior and helped me go forward.”

Now Binstock is more confident and has adjusted to the stresses of college life. With the help of cognitive behavior therapy, she said she built a wall that prevents negative and irrational thoughts, such as the desire to restrict her calorie intake. She knows her body and mind need nourishment – food, journal writing and her support system –, so she can succeed in her studies and reach her goals.

Binstock’s future goals are to study and conduct research on social influences, integrated counseling and genetics associated with psychology. She also wants to teach.  At UST, Binstock is currently working with Psychology Professor Dr. Jo Meier-Marquis on a research project. The Eating Disorder Prevention Program will target students in elementary and middle school using cognitive dissonance theory and role play to help promote a positive body image.

“Melissa’s account of her battle and ongoing recovery from anorexia will resonate with many young women today,” Dr. Meier-Marquis said. “Her experience combined with her interest in psychology is further reflected in the research project she is developing. Our Psychology Department trains students in the psychological sciences with an emphasis on statistics and research methodology. Melissa is one of our stellar students, and is well prepared to conduct such an important study.”

Though she said she was worried about the notoriety, Binstock’s book has shined light on important issues dealing with her disorders. She has been invited to speak at Texas Women’s University and to be the keynote speaker at the Tourette’s Syndrome Association Annual Gala.

“I believe that everything happens for a reason,” Binstock said. “I wouldn’t be the person I am today if I hadn’t moved forward and took the first step. I wanted to turn the ugly things in my life into something positive.”

Binstock’s book, Nourishment, is available at www.xlibris.com, Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble online, www.bn.com.